Come On Irene... {Part Five)

- This week I started my second temp gig. This time it's grunt work for the financial sector. Although the work is all but glamorous, the location for this job has so far made it worth while. Going to work has been the romanticized New York City experience that I believe is the image conjured in most people's minds when that name is spoken. My commute to work begins with taking the F train to Rockefeller Center and walking past Radio City and Top of the Rock, past much high-end shopping, through Rockefeller Plaza and its daily summer farmer's market to Madison Ave. The office sits between Madison and Park, between St. Patrick's Cathedral and the Waldorf Astoria. My ears pop in the elevator ride up 28 floors and once I get there I've got a prime view of the Empire State Building out the office window. Temping will be cool (for a while) if only for allowing me to learn about areas of the city I might not otherwise have any reason to be in.

-  Friday night I got the chance to see someone I've been waiting on for years.

Darling got us tickets to see Cat Power take the stage at Webster Hall near Union Square. The space was intimate and lights were kept dark, only a few bulbs illuminated the band on stage while Chan took to the corner, oftentimes facing the band and shying away from the audience completely. I had heard reports of her canceling or cutting shows early due to stage fright but I've never seen such shyness from a lead singer. Virtually no crowd interaction, no "Hi"'s or "thanks for coming out tonight"'s, just singing, but damn she does it so well. The band played a full set, nearly 2 hours, leaving out the most recognizable songs and choosing instead to fill in with covers of Nico and Fleetwood Mac. I've been a big fan of her's for years, I knew she would be great to see live, but I didn't anticipate that her smoky, sultry voice could be so immense and full and dimensional and soulful. I've never been to a conventional concert (standing, in a bar) that was so beautiful--shivers swelling up and down my body. If she played more often I would see her again and again.

- Constant talk of Hurricane Irene. That's what's been happening in the most recent news. 

I do not intend to dismiss those that have been severely affected by the storm, and my heart goes out to those families, but I feel like it's necessary to state that New Yorkers are so dramatic about everything (that could and probably will be it's own post). The news and press coverage has been soo dramatic but I don't think anything is more true than the list comparison above ^^ people here are worried about going to the liquor store and having enough hummus and dvd rentals. The Park Slope Patch email this morning stated something about Brooklyn continuing to get "pummeled by Hurricane Irene." But folks, Brooklyn (certainly the slope) was not pummeled by a hurricane. It was a heavy rain storm and I slept through most of it. The scariest thing to happen is that the changes in air pressure caused the bottle of champagne to open itself last night. The sound scared the pants off me, I was worried something electrical blew out, but the result was more than pleasant (who wants a bottle of flat champagne!? Drink up!). Not to mention I think over-exaggerations of the press take away from those people who were severely hit, because news in New York is going to trump anything else. The subways and trains are down and will most likely remain so until sometime late tomorrow afternoon. No one is upset because we're all hoping we get another day to stay inside, anyway (snow day! snow day!). I think people, generally, are really enjoying the excuse to snuggle up and take a break for a few days.

I feel like it has been the year of Biblical whether that just missed me. Blizzards, the Memphis flood, tornadoes that skipped TN and destroyed AL, the VA earthquake and now a hurricane?? Sheesh. Safe and sound and not a scratch, thank goodness.

August: Week Three-ish and so on until we damn near see August through... {Part Four}

Losing track of dates and times... some of the happs since last posting:

- Tamarind. The BEST Indian food you will ever eat. And one of the better, more memorable meals of personal history. In the Flatiron district.

- Training with Cash outside. That's right folks, we graduated from indoors to outdoors and we have been fortunate to see success in this area, lord knows we've been paying for it! Although leash work is still in progress, we are able to walk down 7th avenue in Brooklyn during 5PM rush hour traffic without issues. It may not sound like much to you, or maybe you just lack the context for it, but previously, walking with Cash down 7th avenue was our end of year goal (if that lends you any perspective). It's rewarding to have made it to this point before Darling hits the classroom for the school year. We have at this time ceased working with our trainer and are taking matters into our own hands. We have both good days and mediocre days and Cash will continue to challenge us but the choice of daytime activity and morning off-leash hours has been enjoyable for everyone. We are no longer confined to vampire-dog hours when the other misfits come out to play--unless we so choose. The behavior modification is changing everything and I think all 3 of us are happier for it.

- We got our library cards, diggin it.

- Downtown Brooklyn for lunch at the Main Street River Park. New bar stool-chair hybrids from BoConcept. Bookstore browsing. I am falling in love with this side of the East River for many reasons, the stunning views of Gotham is one of them.

- Get caught in a HUGE rainstorm.  And rain in general, multiple times per week. I forget we live on an island...


- A weird dance class at BDC. While normally this would be a highlight, I felt it highlighted the ever-shifting, ever-evolving relationship I have with dance. Something I'm still reflecting on.


- See the big 2011 Tony winner on Broadway (post forthcoming).

- Rent an upholstery cleaner and tackle the couch. As you can see, Cash wasn't too keen on the whole thing although he is the sole reason for the rental in the first place. Laughing so hard at this image.

- Brunch with friends at Bar Tano.


- See The Cave of Forgotten Dreams and The Future 

 
- Temp work begins...


- Darling starts chess lessons in Greenwich Village


- Missing out on the earthquake, feeling totally left out.
 

Food and food for thought. Thoughts and dreams and lack of both. Reading, starving for words, searching for insight, awareness, possibility.

Right. More to share but that's plenty for tonight. xo 

Bookish {- Adjective. 1. given or devoted to reading or study.} 2011

 

Just Kids -- Patti Smith

I love this book.

I can't make a comparison to Jonathan Franzen's The Corrections, otherwise I would tell you this is the best book I've read this year. Both serve as two of my favorite books I've read in a long time.  Just Kids recounts the relationship of Patti Smith and Robert Mapplethorpe in their early days in New York, before fame or photography or music. Young, aspiring artists occasionally sleeping on benches, eating grilled cheese (if eating at all), living in the Hotel Chelsea, and recounting the people, sights, smells and feeling of that time. Smith writes directly, and purposefully, and movingly, never getting caught up or lost in descriptive furies. In fact, the narrative never seems to stop moving forward, verb driven, making the memoir extremely difficult to put down. Her word choices are exquisite, the marriage of good writing and good storytelling. A love letter to New York, my timing for reading this was impeccable. I felt a real connection with her and her references were not lost on me, I've read what she's read, love similar art and music, and I felt a possibility in my life by merely reading about hers. It's a book that changes your perception; I want to write like her, absorb the world like her--what a gift. 

Bookish {- Adjective. 1. given or devoted to reading or study.} 2011

 

The Other End of the Leash -- Patricia McConnell

I have been doing lots and lots of reading where I'm not working or driving anymore. I haven't been recording the books here as I otherwise normally would, and truthfully, if I didn't get a start on it I wouldn't get around to it (much like my journal-ish posts) so the next few posts will most likely be of the bookish persuasion.

 

I find that dog literature is a difficult section of the library or bookstore to navigate. Much like parenting, the gamut has been covered for every style of selecting, raising, training, rehabilitating, and understanding our canine friends. Oftentimes, in my experience, I find that much of the literature is dumbed down to "Learning 101"and while I can appreciate the information presented in a syntax that is accessible, I don't enjoy reading on the levels of an 8th grader when I'm looking for real insight or solid information. Couple this with the previously mentioned spectrum of literature available and one faces the difficult task of finding an author with similar views and values AND who writes on a level and in a style that is digestible and enjoyable.  It's not an easy task and has required some research. Our luck started with finding The Other End of the Leash which has lead us to much more material in the vein we were searching for. With our recent emotional, monetary, and time investment with dog training, it's no wonder that Darling and I are both on the lookout for literature to enhance our knowledge and backup our efforts, the interest in the subject matter should have made itself apparent on this blog long ago. 

 

Written in a style not unlike the pop psychology work of Malcolm Gladwell that I read last year (Blink, The Outliers) McConnell presents personal stories as an Applied Animal Behaviorist, sheep hearder, and dog trainer to illustrate and single out behavior traits, and then backs them up with well researched scientific data. This she presents in a work which acts as an information bridge between the two worlds of scientific journalists/phd types and the general dog loving public. The premise of the book is to further understand the ways in which canines and primates are both similar and different. Understanding ourselves (at the other other end of the leash) as a species and the patterns by which we and other primates physically and emotionally respond to stimuli and comparing that data to the ways in which canines receive and process data, and communicate in their own right. It was both an easy and fascinating book that I read in 2 days. A membership to the Brooklyn library and the reference section in the back of this book has Darling and I in a reading frenzy. For dog lovers, owners, and enthusiasts--it comes with a recommendation.

The Skinny {We're Being Invaded}

 Illustration Via Garance Dore

So, I've been wondering how to write about how uncomfortable I am with New York's obsession with being skinny. For weeks I have thought it feels like all the girls here look like the girls Garance Dore photographs for her blog. (To be fair, it's not just the females, the males are just as bad--I'm merely focusing on my own sex for the purposes of this post.) In our second week I distinctly remember sitting down to Greek food with Darling and asking him if he had seen any fat people in New York? 

Before moving, I imagined that I would feel plain. But I have never felt so plain or pudgy as an ongoing personal characteristic and not just a pms thing. It's absolutely superficial, but it's also deeply personal. It's me, my body, the casing for all that I am and that which I present to the world and myself! For the past few years I've been feeling like I had really gotten past my insecurities and body issues (aside from my shopping problems) and felt like I was in a good place with myself but I suppose these things are relative. 

It's New York City! Anyone can be whoever the hell they want to be and own it, and they do! And along comes little mountain town, South'rn, country ME and I've felt like Sarah Plain And Tall for the last month. The more I explore the city, however, the more I actually suspect that the East Coast has been invaded by freakishly thin, beautiful, Swedish-model-aliens. Okay, so that's a bit extreme, its not just the Swedish looking ones, it's inclusive across all cultures and ethnicities. They have the uncanny ability to look carelessly beautiful, subtle to no makeup, wearing the most amazing clothes and shoes that are immaculate and rarely trying-too-hard. Swedish-alien-models are also almost always "vegan" or "vegetarian" which I believe has very little investment in animal welfare and is actually just another reason to not eat. Not to mention that it seems much of the population compulsively works out. It feels like a lot to keep up with, and completely unnatural for me to try and do so. 

So whatever, I guess that's just how it is, my opinion of what surrounds me doesn't change the reality of what's there but I have experienced these feelings of inadequacy and hyperconsciousness of my physical appearance as a huge, strange part of the culture shock of living here. I felt a sliver of relief today when the aforementioned Garance wrote this post making similar observations, like I wasn't the only one out of my element. Of course, she's coming at it from a completely different perspective; working in fashion, moving from Paris... but I think she accurately describes some of what I see and feel. Although, for the record, I'm giving myself a one-up on her as I think that coming from the South is a much bigger cultural jump than the transatlantic City of Light, no?

We'll see. Don't get me wrong, just read a post down and you'll see that I've been having a great time here, but I'd be lying if I told you there was no adjustment. I also suspect that a lot of my feeling out of place here has a lot to do with me not really having a community. Although I know people here, it doesn't really feel like we're friends in that truer sense of the word. I haven't yet found a job, or found anything to call my own. I feel like a tourist and suspect I will for some time. Currently, my world expands little outside of Darling, Cash and our dog trainer. Don't get me wrong, god, I can't imagine if I were doing this without them! I'm grateful that something is comfortable and homey,  but I feel like a little establishment and grounding in the city will make it seem a little less vast.

Of Photographic Nature

A view from the Highline

Friends sleep over

The view from East River Park in Williamsburg

 Sonic Youth concert

August: Week Two {Part Three}

Saturday 8/5:

- Ride my bike to Fort Greene to meet up with O from Memphis and take a Gaga class at the Mark Morris Dance Center in Brooklyn. The facility is stunning. Gaga is more experimental than anything I've done before and I find my body and brain truly worked by the end.

 -  O and I stop for a bite to eat at a Mediterranean cafe and as we're catching up on the serious side of things, a woman in full-on clown costumery reminds us of the irony and humor in life.

- While searching for after lunch coffee we stumble upon the treasure-filled Brooklyn Flea and find ourselves meandering for a few hours. I find a John Murphy cast resin frame and collage that I bring home to Darling as a thank you and peace offering gift.

- Darling and I grab dinner and stand in line for 3 hours for the Alexander McQueen Savage Beauty exhibit at the Met which we found to be well worth the wait. Exquisite. It was really as good as you heard.

- By the time we get back to the Slope it's 3am and we stop in a 24-hour diner for breakfast before bed.

Sunday 8/6:

- Run around doing house things, hang shelves and prints on the walls.

- Meet up with O again, this time at Brooklyn Bowl in Williamsburg. Talib Kweli fills in for Q-Tip who, sadly, was too sick to dj.  We find good beats and good dancing and eventually score ourselves a lane. 8' chocolate leather chesterfield sofas and gourmet bites make for the swankiest bowling experience I've ever had.

- Darling has a rough night on the train and I have a rough night in the shoes I chose to wear, but we make it home safely.

Monday 8/7:

- ???

- Dog trainer comes and we work on sending Cash to his bed.

- Solidify our love of Indian food delivery and discover The United States of Tara.

Tuesday 8/8:

- Attempted to buy a dress to wear to an interview. Shopping woes and conservative, matronly dressing ensue.

- Dog trainer session followed by a wonderful sushi dinner just down the street. Neither darling nor I can bring ourselves to try the raw shrimp, however.

- Meet friends from Utah at club Splash in Manhattan. Although it's good to see them, it's underage night at the panty bar and S lost his phone. No one plans on a return visit anytime soon although the nice bartender from the Dominican Republic assures me I would have a better time if I returned on a Thursday or Saturday.

- Officially become addicted to the Scrabble game on my phone while waiting for MTA (always).

Wednesday 8/9:

 - Darling comes with me to return the conservative, matronly dress after which we go to Trash and Vaudeville in the East Village.

- Eat at Katz's Deli and wander from the LES through Nolita and Tribeca before heading home.

- Utah friends C and S come to stay with us! Not only are they our first overnight guests but also the first people to come to the house (with the exception of the landlord and dog trainer). Although not perfect, Cash does really well with our new greeting routine. No barking or peeing in the house! We are parents beaming with pride for him and feel much better about all the $$$ we have been spending on training.

- Sit down for an amazing dinner at Applewood in Park Slope to catch up on conversation with friends and enjoy the slower pace Brooklyn offers before going home to bed.

Thursday 8/10:

- Head to Midtown where I sign on with a temp agency. I feel good about having a place to start even if it's not the place I'll be. Hoping for a few days of work soon!

- Grab a Vietnamese sandwich and bubble tea for lunch. Stroll with friends up to Grand Army Plaza and down through Prospect Park before they leave for home.

- Back to Manhattan, LES, for some much needed haircuts. We split pimento cheese dip and one the best cheeseburgers either of us have tasted at Peels.

- Take the boy out for a much needed night swim and run at the park. Listen to the end of the Cut Copy concert happening simultaneously and come home exhausted.

Friday 8/11:

- Blog updates for what's been hip hop happening.

- Dog trainer scheduled to come by for our first outdoor session.

- Plans for some epic live music

...TBD...

Damn Yankees

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 R H E BAL 0 0 1 0 0 1 0 0 0 2 6 1 NYY 0 0 0 4 0 0 0 0 - 4 7 1

August: Week One {Part Two}

Saturday 7/30:

- Pick up bagels and train to the Brooklyn Promenade to enjoy breakfast and a nice view. We discuss the buildings and agree that the Verizon high-rise is offensive. Darling seems particulary put out, should possibly start sending letters to VIP's.
- Walk to Brooklyn Bridge Park with the intention of canoeing the bay but opt out of waiting in line and choose instead to explore DUMBO.

Sunday 7/31:

- Pick up coffee and train to the Frick to see the returned Bellini painting and enjoy the collection. The space is inviting and accessible, unlike MoMa, and we enjoy ourselves there. Talk about the works and the building itself. Why is it people of money aren't investing in building spaces of significance anymore? Quality over quantity, is it a debate?
- Head to Yankee Staduim for a Yankees vs. Oriels game, enjoy over priced ballpark food and see Jeeter get clocked in the collar bone with a 93 mph fast ball. He walked bases and was not seen for the rest of the game.
- Train south and walk through the West Village and Meat Packing District.
- Eat at the Standard Grill and walk the length of the newly completed Highline Park. Such a gorgeous and interesting public space that shows both vision and initiative. Make mental notes to hit up the rollerskating rink there sometime this summer.

Monday 8/1:

- First session with dog trainer, it is rather intense for everyone involved.
- Train to SoHo with Darling to listen to new speakers. Come home later to find them in my living room. All I can think is that they sound fake: crystal clear, lots of depth, perfect balance. We start shuffling through all our music to test them out although my suspicion is that Darling did it all for the Beach Boy's Pet Sounds album.
- Leave the stereo store and meet up at Eataly in Chelsea with two Memphis dance friends that happened to be in the city at the same time! It is such a breath of fresh air to be with their beautiful hearts and see their lovely, familiar faces. They are sweet to buy my dinner and we walk to Washington Square before parting ways. Too short, but I am grateful it worked out. I still have a chance for another meeting and possible dance class with one of them in the coming week.

Tuesday 8/2:

- Cash is carted off to daycare in Williamsburg and we spend the day with plumbers and delivery men but in the end are happy with a new stove.
- Consume ourselves with organization and house stuff. I break to pick up Vietnamese sandwiches (our new favorite lunch). We tackle the basement and get lots of garbage left from the previous tenant curbside, much of it is taken by folks to be reused, quickly.
- We take turns rinsing off in the shower and I prepare a quick dinner before we wind down the evening with a Sufjan Stevens concert in Prospect Park. Sufjan quotes Whitman and gives us beautiful music in what is now essentially our backyard.

Wednesday 8/3:

- Second session of training, the hardest thus far.
- Shuttle to Ikea for some returns and end up spending 2.5 hours there. We leave with a few items but are ultimately disappointed and feel worse about the state of humanity afterward. An anxiety of landfills overflowing with cheaply made particle board junk follows me for the remainder of the evening.
- Go to Lowe's to buy paint and a few items to get started on our converted office project.
- Order pizza and spend the night painting and feeling better about the state of our living quarters. It is satisfying and exercises our minds as we brainstorm new projects to take on.

Thursday 8/4:

- Third session with the trainer, we see very positive results.
- Train into SoHo to pick up speaker stands and look for wall organizer to no avail.
- Make our way to the BAM Rose Cinema, the fanciest of movie houses I've ever been inside, to see the new Tribe Called Quest documentary Beats, Rhymes & Life (recommended).
- Walk home stopping for sushi along the way. Thinking all the way how crazy it is that life happens the way it does, where I am, to be doing what we're doing.

Friday 8/5:

- Fourth training session, more positive results and begin formulating a plan for future sessions. Everyone is proud of Cash, he continues to problem solve and work hard. The sessions wear my honey bear out and he sleeps for most of the day.
- Blogging, catch up on all that has been happening before it gets away.
- TBD...



Things I would like to do this weekend (aside from the obvious "get a job"):

- See the Alexander McQueen exhibit at the MET before it is taken down on Sunday
- Get to a dance class.
- Take a nap, sheesh...

First Month Update {Part One}

Dear Diary,

Kidding! But seriously... I'm actually writing this post out on the ipad because the desktop is disconnected currently. That is my excuse for a post sans photographs. I do, however, feel it is important to write down some kind of update as I don't journal much outside of what you see here and the details tend to slip my mind pretty damn quickly. If I continue to wait until I have the photos uploaded and selected I am certain much of it will become blurred. If the photos make it up to the site later, I will consider it a bonus--I'll try. Darling has also asked me if I would keep track of what has been happening these last few days. Where he has the month of August off, a lot has already happened and the future looks to promise more of the same. Here is part 1.

Can you believe it? I've lived in New York for one month. That's pretty wild. Although everything still feels new, the trippiest and hardest element to get used to is the way the city consumes time. It is the most bizarre time-warp of an experience to get things done on these islands. A day can be filled with some serious adventures, sensory overload, high and low brow entertainment, cultural soirees, and anything else you could imagine (like when I met up with these guys for lunch and we roasted marshmellows for s'mores at our table in the middle of Manhattan!). It's possible to see Renior paintings and the NY Yankees within 3 hours of each other and that completely blows my mind. But the opposite side of the coin reveals that it can also take 2 hours just to go to the bank and get back home. New York has a way of eating up time for simple tasks between all the walking, waiting on MTA, and long lines.

Sister Wedding: Aside from feeling seriously whipplashed (bouncing from Memphis, to NY, to Seattle, to CDA, back to NY in a matter of 3 weeks) and slightly anxious (about life in general) we had a great time at the wedding, everything was beautiful! I think the Inland Empire region is absolutely breathtaking. I forget how cool the nights are out West, even in the middle of summer. Although, I think our time there was exceptionally chilly. While the rest of the country was experiencing a wicked heat wave, the temperatures were dropping down to 48F in the evening and I had to keep reminding myself that it was, in fact, July. After experiencing the beginning of another Memphis summer, I welcome any break from the heat with open arms, I only wish I had packed our suitcase with that in mind. We managed by spending lots of time around a fire and dreaming up the blueprints for a rotisserie chair since we couldn't figure out the logistics for the rotating fire pit that actually would have been ideal. We slept in a sweet VW van in the backyard, we had breakfast from the garden (the garden needs its own post), and we put our hands to use where we could. It was quick and sweet, I hope to see the Mr. and Mrs. for some quality time soon.


Cash Man: After we got home from our travels, it was all too apparent that we needed to get serious with a dog behaviorist. The trainer I had previously scheduled to meet with didn't show up to our meeting (trains, and other weirdness) but in retrospect, it was the right thing--she was not the right trainer for our dog. We called a behaviorist at our vet's recommendation and have been working with him all week, completing 4 sessions. Sessions have proven to be both intense and depleting for everyone in the house. I don't know how much I have alluded to or explained here, but despite Cash's sweetness and trainability, he has some very real aggression issues that must be addressed. The aggression is fear-based, defensive, and very obviously stems from a serious anxiety. Our plan is to first address the aggression, replacing it with positive reinforcement training for correct behavior, then address the anxiety with therapy work and confidence building. I feel hopeful, that we are doing the right thing but also feel that it is going to be a long, expensive process (donations to a "Save Cash" *wink* foundation fund are totally accepted). We ARE seeing rapid progress and are receiving great feedback. A page has turned for the little man and we are ready to accept a new norm for all of us. I am broken hearted that for so many, animals are like library books, to be checked in and out at the whim of humans. I understand that not all animals are right for all families, but for us, the choice to adopt an animal is a commitment, and one that is non-negotiable once made. Not knowing Cash's breed or past history makes some of this task difficult but I'm feeling confident that we are with a behaviorist whose approach and plan for Cash is tailored to his specific needs. I am sure this is a topic that will be updated and revisited frequently.


Last Week: Last week comes back to me as a blur... I can't really say I know what happened other than we did laundry. Which, I can at least tell you a note on laundry (real quick, if you've made it this far in reading you can handle it!) So basically I hate laundry (I think this is universal truth) and Darling and I are slowly forming a bad habit of pay by the pound laundry because it may just be the closest thing to true magic that either of us has ever experienced. There is a great laundromat around the corner (we don't even have to cross the street) and for $0.75/lb (which is only a few dollars more than washing the bundle ourselves) I can drop off the basket and a few hours later pick up the most pristinely folded, clean laundry I have ever laid my eyes on. For me, total effort is a maximum of 5 minutes, and I have never seen my bath towels and underwear folded to the same size before but it's remarkable. Everything comes back in these super tidy stacks ready to put away. It blows my mind! And landry, aside from the expense, has become a totally joyful experience.


Carving our way through this remarkable city has been both wonderful and trying. It, as with all things, is balanced that way. I'm struggling most with my own confidence here. I understand that with time and meeting people and feeling like I have an established community this will change, but I would be lying if I denied to you the quiet fights with myself since arriving. I'm not sure how to field the, "How's life in New York?" question just yet, I don't have the experience to answer something so heavy although I am aware the indented response is, "It's wonderful! How are you?!" I'm not struggling nearly as much as I did upon moving to Memphis and I feel like this alone is promising and proof of strength learned. I do know that community will be essential, that having a job, a "place," will also serve to quiet my head. To do what we can, right now (because these things take time), Darling and myself are working hard to adjust our new apartment, lots of painting, cleaning and fine tuning what we need to do in order to create a comfortable and welcoming space that works in our smaller-than-we're-used-to living quarters. The progress is rapid and satisfying. We are making it our own and that is always an important part of the transition for me. It has become a personal science seeing as I have stayed no longer than 1.5 years in one place in the past 8 years. Lots of running to Lowe's, compiling a big list of items about to go up for sale on Craigslist, and browsing for new space savers--it's getting there.


...


To be continued.